YESTURDAY'S YO-YOS

Don't get me wrong: I know what I am supposed to think about the way he created me. In the beginning of the Bible when God created the heavens and the earth and things he had made, he said it was good. Now God doesn't change so he created me to be good as well. Why don't I get this? The painful way I feel about my appearance, as described yesturday is contrasted by the way God thinks. How can I think like God thinks?

THE PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE

Our life group is starting to study the "Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. I just happen to of been given the book, a couple years ealier. I am choosing to study this book for the forty days, that is required to read this book one chapter at a time, I am good at starting things but I need to learn the endurance part of studing till the end, forty days was signicicant in the Bible for many spiritual purposes. Can all you friends who are reading this blog help me stay committed to sticking this out so that I may encounter God in a new and amazing way as I discover what his purpose for me is.
The first week is : What on earth am I here for?
A life devoted to things is a dead life, a stump, a God shaped life is a flourishing tree. Proverbs 11:28
Blessed are those who trust in the Lord... they are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green and they go right on producing delicious fruit.Jeremiah17:7-8

IT ALL STARTS WITH GOD

For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible...everything got started with him and finds it purpose in him . Colossians 1:16

Focusing on ourselves will never reveal our lifes purpose. An inventer is a creator who makes things, with a purpose, if saw something new you may have your own ideas of what it could be. Without asking the inventor we wouldn't know his disires for the things he created. We need to ask the creator to help us understand what we were made for.

I knew Josiah was going on a field trip to the hospital for the carnival, he forgot something. He forgot his medic alert bracelet, this particular item was designed so that if he was lost, it would speak for him. There is a phone number is a 24 hour service if he is found they could phone me and tell me where Josiah was. If he doesn't wear it and he gets lost, there is no purpose in even having this item, He needs to wear it in order for it to help him. I ran this item to the school just in case, something happened. Today everything went well.

Everyday I decide whose team I am on, I can put on my own selfish identy or the God like identy in my heart. If I want purpose I need God. I need to remind myself that my identy doesn't come from how I look, how successful I am, how funny I am, what my kids or my husband thinks about me. Again I remind myself that It all starts with..................JESUS CHRIST, MY SAVIOR, MY REDEAMER, AND MY LOVER. My life started with him and my purpose comes from him. Lord help me find purpose in YOU.

I AM NOT AN ACCIDENT
I am your Creator, you were in my care before you were born. Isaiah 44:2a

He loves me as if there were only one of me, one person on the earth to love. He really really loves me and I can't imagine, how much, and what is this kind of love is really like. Sometimes I think I do but I know I don't. I was loved by him before I was created, and then he created me out of love.

Question to ponder

I know that God uniquely created me. What areas of mypersonality, background and phsical appearance am I stuggling to accept? I feel fat and unsexy, I don't think my husband thinks I am beautiful, he never tells me that I am beautiful or sexy. Am I really that ugly? One of my children thinks I have ugly hair, I heard it once lately. The doctor tells me I am fat and need to loose weight and then I am given pills that make it harder to control my appitite and fat gain is easier then loss. I want to exercise but it really hasn't showen me results. So I feel frusterated and give up. Then God says he created me this way, does he really love me, fat and all. Why would God create ugly people? Or do I have this all wrong.

How can I accept who I am? What God think beauty is? How can I think the way God really thinks? So I have lots to think about and many purposes to find. God help me to believe I am not an accident and I am beautiful to him I think.

Be Thou my Vision

I am without glasses and this is really difficult to see anything. You can't realize how difficult it is to see until you are without your glasses. When Josiah's glasses were broken I wanted him to go to school, his prescription is way worse then mine. Being without glasses really does make it more difficult to think to balance and everything. I need Christ to be my strenght during this time, I feel headaches at times, I really need his strenght. It should help me see better the doctor gave me a higher prescription, he said I would be able to drive better at night, ha ha.

In a spiritual sense, even though I know God, I have a blurred sense of where to go when I am without my time with God. I want to have a break from the light when my eyes are getting unclear signals. I have taken to many breaks from spending time with God. I need to find my way. Thy word is a lamp unto my path, when I put the word as a priority, and meditate on it I am getting vision in the direction that I want to move, then I will not stumble and fall. And the Lord becomes the Lord of all.

I need to take more medicaton I am now back up to 20 ml of prednizone and 150 ml of immuran and all the other pills. I am frusterated that I am not healed completly although I realize that I have been healed along the way I no longer need a liver transplant anytime soon. And only God can do that.

Last summer was really crazy I need wisdom and strength to do and see things the way God would like me do to things. I do believe that we would like to do homeschooling and have family devotions I haven't found a devotional that will work yet. Although we have started the schooling for some days where Stephen is working and we need some work to keep their minds and hands busy. May the Lord give me strenght and vision for the summ

The Answer

Remember the exercise question: How many minutes of exercise do I need to do to loose weight? 200 to 300 minutes of exercise is required to do it the healthy way. I still have to figure out the plan of how I am going to do this.

Help is on its way

We are going to be getting a new thing called "results" it is suppose to hydrate the eggs so they are easier to comb out. I will tell you more later.

Isolation

When I was nine I was admitted to the hospital and I was in isolation, they never knew what I had could this be contagious or what. I was in isolation for at least two weeks, it felt terrible.

Sharona and I have lice. Is this an isolation thing or what? Sharona has had the nix shampoo three times already and I have spent hours taking the nits out of her hair, and I'm not done yet. The school is okay with her returning to school, I talked to the principal and the teacher. I am doing what I can.

On Sunday I never thought twice about weather or not we go to church, later that day I did see some live lice in her hair. I knew then that we should shampoo again, this was now the second time the first time was thursday night. This time I cut her hair, she did use conditioner by mistake not realizing that I would be nixing her hair. In my growing up we went to church and stayed home for nothing sunday mornings. I feel that I have offended some one for
coming to church.

On Monday she went to school and Tuesday I kept her home: we washed our sheets for the second time.

I do remember going through this before and I never really made a big deal about it and it didn't take a long time to get rid of either.

Are we expected to stay in isolation? from church? life group? everywhere except school? And for how long?

I am not able to take my own nits out of my hair, is there anyone who can help me. I have asked Stephen several times and he still hasn't he says there are no more bugs in my hair. I have uses nix once and mainase and even vinager, I might be allergic to vinager.

I do think I am making slow progress with Sharona's hair. Why do we think this is a thing that means we are dirty? Why does it feel so terrible? Is it because I hate being isolated from the world.

Question Time

How many minutes of excercise do I need to do to adequetly loose weight per week? The answer was taught to me at the west winds clinic. I will tell you shortly, next blog.